A Wonderful Weekend!

I just have to share what a wonderful weekend I had. I went to the Ladies Conference down in Montgomery with the ladies from New Life. We had such a blessed weekend and I really got blessed. I also received freedom from all the doubt that has been plaguing my mind. My mind is my weakest point and I was just constantly under attack with doubt and fear, but after Friday night that was all shattered!!! I feel like I have more confidence now and a better understanding of how the devil attacks me through my mind and I have picked up some new ways to shut him down and get rid of all the negativity. It' s just so freeing!!! Ok...I'm gonna give you a run down of what happened, because I feel I am supposed to share what happened to me. We got down there Friday morning and went straight in to the first service and I just couldn't get into it...I was just kinda numb. I thought maybe it was the trip down. We got out of service, grabbed some lunch and did a little shopping and went to the hotel to get ready for evening service. We got there that evening and found a place on the side of the stage where we could sit in the front row. I was sitting on the last chair of the front row. I listened to the message and sat there and I heard it, I remember it, but I wasn't all there. Then it was alter call and the Spirit was really moving, but I could not move. I couldn't get up out of my seat, it was like fear and doubt were ropes holding me there and I was watching everyone and all that was in my mind was negativity. "Look at these people, look what they are doing, they are crazy, this is a cult, this is bad, you don't need to be around this, this is wrong, what they are doing it wrong," all that and more over and over again in my mind and I still could not stand up. I don't remember how I came to be standing at last, but I remember Sister Dillon coming off the stage to pray with someone that was close to me and then she came to me, and took my hands and she started to pray with me and she looked my right in the eyes and said, "He's lying to you, everything he's telling you is a lie. He's a liar and he can't take this from you" And she said many more words as she prayed with me, but those are the words I remember loud and clear. And it was just like glass shattering, all that doubt and fear just broke into millions of little pieces and went scattering about. It was almost as if I could see it shattering. And I felt so happy, I began praying with her and finally speaking in tongues and crying. It was just the greatest thing in the world to have all that fear, all that doubt broken away from me. I don't think I quit crying until we started home! So that is what happened to me this weekend. Oh, there's more...don't doubt that..it was a wonderful weekend and Sunday was just as great. Kaelyn got the Holy Ghost and Attie got saved and both Emma and Attie got baptized and Greg and Kelly came for a visit and we had an amazing prayer service. I feel like I got to live on the mountain top for the weekend, to see that there really is hope. Chris and I have been so stressed and so down, even though we are happy in Jesus, the stress is still real and there is more stress ahead for us, but it was so nice to have this weekend on top of the world. To have that reminder that good things are coming, all we have to do is follow and obey...

Almost a break down, but not quite

Well, it's no secret that Chris and I have been under lots of stress. And I've been handling it pretty well up until about a month ago. Then 2 weeks ago, I started crashing. Panic attacks everyday, migraines, anxiety through the roof...all of it. I got to see the doctor today and we have tweeked my meds. I've seriously upped my pill count, but tonight I feel slightly calmer. I don't have a huge headache tonight...so I will declare victory for a small step forward. We've left my Geodon alone, left the Buspar alone as well, upped my Celexa and added Inderal. I've gone from taking 3 pills a night to taking 12 spaced out through out the day. That will be hard for me to get used to, I'm not used to needing meds during daylight hours. I'm hoping that a side effect of the Inderal will be lowered blood pressure, cause mine's been a little high lately. I did get the troublesome tooth out Friday, so that is also a good thing. I'm still a little sore from the numbing injections...but hey, over all, not so bad. I've been sleeping a little more during the day as well since then, not sure why...maybe just all of this combined and I need the extra couple hours of sleep. So, that's the news from this front...here's hoping that calmer days are in my future!!!

A day in my life...

It's been an eventful day...so might as well blog about it. Kaelyn was out sick today...but she started feeling better about mid morning...so we headed out to Huntsville to run a few errands. We had some chinese and went shopping for nail polish. While we were at Walmart I found a new red betta that I liked...so I got him...his pick is on FB if you wanna check him out. I plan to breed this summer, I've got a black crowntail and a crimson fantail. I just need to find some really pretty females and I'll be ready to go. Well, we did our running and went back home...Kaelyn helped dad out for a bit while I visited with mom, Lynn and Hudson. I tell you he is getting too cute, or I should say handsome. We're so used to having girls it's gonna take a while to adjust our talk!! The kids got in from school and put in some serious outside play since the day was so nice. All was well and right with the world. Well, Chris heads out to church before dinner to get somethings done at the church and I was finishing up the cooking, taking the chicken out of the oven when Attie walks in the kitchen. She takes a look at the chicken and says: "Did that chicken come from a live chicken?" I laughed and said yes. She immediately decided she didn't want chicken...she thought that was gross. Then Kaelyn informed her that all chicken was once alive and she really got disgusted. I'm not sure the kid will ever eat chicken again. It was hilarious. So Attie chooses to just have mac n cheese for dinner. Right now the kids are watching some Phineas and Ferb and taking turns playing on the Ipad. It's quiet in here...which is unusual. I'm sure there will be some disturbance of the peace shortly. But that was my day...it was one of the more interesting ones...just a peek into everyday life at the Vaughn house!!

February 2012

Ah, February...how quickly you fly by. Kaelyn's birthday was wonderful...she had a great time! We've been super busy this month with church activities. The sickness has also struck...Chris has been under the weather for a while now. And Attie has missed several days due to strep and now allergies. We visited the doctor today and got new allergy meds...I'm hoping they help. Emma has been the healthiest one of all this month..not a thing wrong with her!! Dad has been in the hospital in Bham since Monday, started out as just a routine surgery to repair is defib, ended up with a week long stay because they can't regulate his b/p. Today it's up though and we are in hopes that he will get to come home soon!! And can I tell you I'm ready for spring to get here!! We've had a mild winter, but I'm ready to see the green leaves and grass and all the flowers again. This brown grass gets boring. I'm ready to see some life in the earth again!! I can't wait to have a nice day to take pics of the girls...so many ideas I want to try. I need some loving soul to buy me a new lens for my camera...that would just be awesome!! Alas though, feeding the kiddies comes first!! Darn kids, have to feed them everyday or they get all whiney!!! Poor Bucky is ready for warm weather as well, he's spent the past week staring out of the corner of his cage into the back yard. Well, that's all I can think about to blog at the moment...I'm sure more will come to me later!!

He builds us back

Just sitting here listening to the Newsboys and Build Us Back came on. Love it! So true!! My life is far from perfect and all my safety nets are torn, but God builds me back from all of that. He makes me stronger everyday. He will mend the broken safety nets, He will pay the bills, He will fix the cars when they break, He will take care of everything in my life. There is so much freedom in this...for so long I've been looking for a way to be truly me, to be the real person that I am...and all along the answer was in front of me. Just trusting Jesus makes me more free than I've ever been in my life, all those old chains are broken. Everyday He breaks down more and more of those walls I have built around myself, everyday I become a little more the real me that I'm meant to be!!! Build Us Back Newsboys We've been crumbled, we've been crushed City walls have turned to dust Broken hands and blistered feet We walk for miles to find relief When the thief takes, when our hopes cave You build us back You build us back When the earth shakes, when the world breaks You build us back You build us back We are scared, we are poor All our safety nets are torn We've been humbled to our knees From these ruins, we believe When the thief takes, when our hopes cave You build us back You build us back When the earth shakes, when the world breaks You build us back You build us back Redeemer, redeem us Restorer, restore us Oh build us back Though the mountains be shaken, the hills be removed Your unfailing love remains After all that's been taken, Your promise, still sacred You build us back with precious stones When the thief takes, when our hopes cave You build us back You build us back When the earth shakes, when the world breaks You build us back You build us back

January 2012

Wow. It's 2012 and it's already flying by. Attie's birthday is tomorrow, my baby will be 6!! It just does not seem possible that she is that old. We had a little party for her Saturday and she had fun with Olivia all day, she loved her presents and cake. Next item is to get ready for Kaelyn's birthday in a few weeks. She will be 11 and that makes me feel old...I have a solid decade of parenting behind me...I am old. Chris has started back to school for this term...oh joy. He's probably enjoying Cal 2...the oddball that he is. I am, how to say it right, learning. Yeah, learning. I'm growing...that is for sure...but into what I do not know yet. We'll see...maybe I'll be really cool or something.

Christmas is past us...

It was wonderful. We had such a good time and ate lots of good food!! The kids got so many goodies, they are having a blast playing with all their stuff!!! We did some family pic at Jo's house this year...check out my Facebook for ours. Let's see what all did the kids get?? Kaelyn got a foot spa, Orbies, a new bike from the grandparents and new clothes. Emma got an Easy Bake Oven, a new MP3 player from the grandparents and other goodies and clothes. Attie got an Angry Birds game, Hello Kitty stuff and other goodies and clothes. They got quite a haul this year, the little punks!!! We even braved the day after sales in a few places...that was ok, I guess. We are looking forward to a quiet day at home tomorrow and then Wednesday I'll have to break down and do a little grocery shopping...but tomorrow is just chilling at the house.