A Shattered View

I'm having issues today. Panic attacks and I'm very stressed out. I always get a little panicked when Chris is at work, but I can normally PSP my way through it. Today I'm having no luck. The kids are really not helping either...all they can do today is fight with each other. I think I'm gonna have to speak to my doctor about something for this anxiety, I don't want any new drugs, but being like this is not healthy either. I know my blood pressure is sky high right now and all I want to do is cry. I can't lay down and sleep it off because I need to watch the kids. I have been playing on the computer most of the day. Trying to keep my mind off of it, but my chest won't stop hurting and I've had to hide from the girls a couple of times when I felt like I couldn't keep from crying. I don't want to upset them. Chris doesn't get off work until 5 and then he has an hours drive home, so it will be 6 at the earliest before he's home and something always happens to make him late. I guess I will just have to deal with it till he gets home...no matter how hard that is to do.